Weekly Interview: Beth Villandry (printed Sept. 21, 2007)
By Amanda Estes
Staff Writer
Beth Villandry said 20 and 30 somethings across the nation are choosing to face cancer with humor – young and twisted humor that is.
There is “Crazy Sexy Cancer,” a documentary film by Kris Carr, who, at 31, was diagnosed with a rare and incurable cancer. Author of Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips, Carr also uses a blog to share information and advice about how to dodge “verbal bullets,” from well meaning people who associate cancer with death and dying. Another Web site, PlanetCancer.org, offers Cancertainment in the form of book, movie and music reviews and cancer comics. The Web site, I’mtooyoungforthis.org offers this advice: “Got Cancer? Under 40? Sucks, huh? Get busy living!”
Villandry hopes to bring this new attitude toward cancer to Maine with Live2Thrive, a networking group for young adult cancer patients and survivors between the ages of 18 and “45-ish.” It will not be a typical support group or “cancers anonymous,” the Portland resident said during a recent interview at the Cancer Community Center (CCC) on Main Street in South Portland.
As a new CCC program, the group’s first gathering will be an outdoor brunch from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m. on Sept. 23 at Pineland Farms in New Gloucester. The Hit the Trails…Walk, Run, Stroll will take place immediately following brunch. The event features live entertainment and food, as people of all ages come together to raise funds and awareness for CCC. All programs – from yoga to movie nights – are offered at no cost to adults living with cancer, their families and friends.
Villandry and a core group interested people have been meeting since April to discuss the issues they hope the group can address. Guest speakers will discuss topics that tend to uniquely affect young adults with cancer such as career planning, financial planning, sex and dating and child-rearing and family issues.
For young people just starting out on a career path, cancer treatments are a “huge cause of debt,” Villandry said. In addition, some people may be unsure about returning to work.
Other topics of discussion might include how to talk to your children about cancer or how to deal with fertility issues, Villandry said. If you’re single, navigating the dating scene can be scary and when you “add in the cancer factor, it can be very overwhelming,” Villandry said.
Villandry has had personal experience with “absolutely all” of the proposed topics.
At 37, Villandry was in the middle of an internal medicine residency program when suddenly, she found herself in the role of the patient. It has been nearly two years since Villandry was diagnosed with a rare heart cancer.
Villandry underwent open-heart surgery and aggressive chemotherapy. She spent three months in the hospital, half of that time in the intensive care unit.
Looking back at the span of time between diagnosis and the end of her treatment, Villandry said she had refused to admit she had cancer. With her body under prolonged physical stress, Villandry said it was almost necessary for her to go into a state of denial because she didn’t have the “emotional reserve” to deal with what was happening.
Villandry said she is doing “well from a cancer standpoint,” but is still dealing with treatment side effects such as fatigue and neurocognitive issues.
It wasn’t until the chemo ended that Villandry began to admit to herself that she had cancer. She started looking for a support group geared toward people in their 20s and 30s. What she found was that many support groups were diagnosis centered and were focused on children or an older generation.
Even while surrounded by supportive and empathetic friends, Villandry felt isolated. She was searching for people who would understand what she was going through without her having to say a word.
It was a yoga class that initially drew her to the CCC, although at the time she wasn’t sure she belonged there.
“When you get cancer, everybody is handing you fliers,” she said of learning about the center. “I leafed through and thought, ‘This is for my grandmother, not for me.’”
Jennifer Manzi MacLeod, outreach coordinator for the CCC, said, “Beth coming here has been a huge milestone for us.”
While it can be difficult for anyone to walk through the center’s doors, MacLeod said young cancer survivors often can’t find time in their day to come in. People in their 20s and 30s are often busy starting careers and families. Traditionally the center has not offered many weekend programs, but MacLeod said they hope to cater to active adults who want to make a connection while having fun.
The intent of Live2Thrive is for people to come together, engage in new activities and gain a sense of empowerment, but to also just participate in some of the activities that their peers may take for granted.
Planned activities include a group hike on Mount Katahdin, a “Cancer Stinks Happy Hour,” a regular poker night, bowling, movie nights, Casco Bay cruises and surfing.
Villandry said surfing this summer was a major milestone in her journey. While she doesn’t yet have enough stamina for some activities, she is hooked on yoga and takes walks with her dogs.
“You operate under this notion once chemo is done, you’re going to bounce right back,” she said. “Cancer survivorship is living with a chronic disease. Remission is not a cure.”
Villandry said she hopes Live2Thrive will bring more awareness to the men and women in society’s middle generation. She cited a 2006 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) report encompassing nearly 30 years and said the mortality rate for cancers in young adults has remained steady at 50 percent, while cancers affecting others such as pediatric leukemia are now essentially curable.
“That offends me,” she said.
Highlights from a National Cancer Institute cancer epidemiology report for young adults between the ages of 15 and 29, spanning 1975 to 2000 show, “survival improvement trends portend a worse prognosis for young adults diagnosed with cancer today than 25 years ago, and the deficit is increasing with longer follow up.”
According to the report, “lack of awareness, inadequate health insurance coverage, lack of clinical trial participation, and a deficit in translational research” are all contributing factors to a higher mortality rate than those found with pediatric or geriatric cancers.
While there are social support programs available for patients with other illnesses, Villandry is an advocate of a “cancer rehab program” to provide patients with sustained support after treatment.
In terms of advice for people who aren’t sure how to offer support to a friend with cancer, Villandry said, “Be the same friend you were before.”
“Some people for their own reasons, can’t do it,” she said, adding her own friendships were not immune from change.
While she lost some friends, she had others who gathered around her hospital bed with “rag mags” and talk of boys, dating and parenthood.
Since her treatment ended, Villandry has stepped back into the dating scene, but said at the time she was still figuring out her own sense of normal and wasn’t ready to emotionally invest in a relationship.
“I actually went on a few dates when I was still bald,” she said. She has become even more selective about men and jokes, “Cancer is a great screening question.”
For more information about Live2Thrive and the Cancer Community Center, call 774-2200 or visit www.cancercommunitycenter.com. To make a donation, visit www.firstgiving.com/bethv.
Anyone interested in attending the Live2Thrive brunch, must call the Cancer Community Center to register by noon this Saturday. Anyone who has not previously registered for Hit the Trails may make a donation on the day of the event.
Staff Writer
Beth Villandry said 20 and 30 somethings across the nation are choosing to face cancer with humor – young and twisted humor that is.
There is “Crazy Sexy Cancer,” a documentary film by Kris Carr, who, at 31, was diagnosed with a rare and incurable cancer. Author of Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips, Carr also uses a blog to share information and advice about how to dodge “verbal bullets,” from well meaning people who associate cancer with death and dying. Another Web site, PlanetCancer.org, offers Cancertainment in the form of book, movie and music reviews and cancer comics. The Web site, I’mtooyoungforthis.org offers this advice: “Got Cancer? Under 40? Sucks, huh? Get busy living!”
Villandry hopes to bring this new attitude toward cancer to Maine with Live2Thrive, a networking group for young adult cancer patients and survivors between the ages of 18 and “45-ish.” It will not be a typical support group or “cancers anonymous,” the Portland resident said during a recent interview at the Cancer Community Center (CCC) on Main Street in South Portland.
As a new CCC program, the group’s first gathering will be an outdoor brunch from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m. on Sept. 23 at Pineland Farms in New Gloucester. The Hit the Trails…Walk, Run, Stroll will take place immediately following brunch. The event features live entertainment and food, as people of all ages come together to raise funds and awareness for CCC. All programs – from yoga to movie nights – are offered at no cost to adults living with cancer, their families and friends.
Villandry and a core group interested people have been meeting since April to discuss the issues they hope the group can address. Guest speakers will discuss topics that tend to uniquely affect young adults with cancer such as career planning, financial planning, sex and dating and child-rearing and family issues.
For young people just starting out on a career path, cancer treatments are a “huge cause of debt,” Villandry said. In addition, some people may be unsure about returning to work.
Other topics of discussion might include how to talk to your children about cancer or how to deal with fertility issues, Villandry said. If you’re single, navigating the dating scene can be scary and when you “add in the cancer factor, it can be very overwhelming,” Villandry said.
Villandry has had personal experience with “absolutely all” of the proposed topics.
At 37, Villandry was in the middle of an internal medicine residency program when suddenly, she found herself in the role of the patient. It has been nearly two years since Villandry was diagnosed with a rare heart cancer.
Villandry underwent open-heart surgery and aggressive chemotherapy. She spent three months in the hospital, half of that time in the intensive care unit.
Looking back at the span of time between diagnosis and the end of her treatment, Villandry said she had refused to admit she had cancer. With her body under prolonged physical stress, Villandry said it was almost necessary for her to go into a state of denial because she didn’t have the “emotional reserve” to deal with what was happening.
Villandry said she is doing “well from a cancer standpoint,” but is still dealing with treatment side effects such as fatigue and neurocognitive issues.
It wasn’t until the chemo ended that Villandry began to admit to herself that she had cancer. She started looking for a support group geared toward people in their 20s and 30s. What she found was that many support groups were diagnosis centered and were focused on children or an older generation.
Even while surrounded by supportive and empathetic friends, Villandry felt isolated. She was searching for people who would understand what she was going through without her having to say a word.
It was a yoga class that initially drew her to the CCC, although at the time she wasn’t sure she belonged there.
“When you get cancer, everybody is handing you fliers,” she said of learning about the center. “I leafed through and thought, ‘This is for my grandmother, not for me.’”
Jennifer Manzi MacLeod, outreach coordinator for the CCC, said, “Beth coming here has been a huge milestone for us.”
While it can be difficult for anyone to walk through the center’s doors, MacLeod said young cancer survivors often can’t find time in their day to come in. People in their 20s and 30s are often busy starting careers and families. Traditionally the center has not offered many weekend programs, but MacLeod said they hope to cater to active adults who want to make a connection while having fun.
The intent of Live2Thrive is for people to come together, engage in new activities and gain a sense of empowerment, but to also just participate in some of the activities that their peers may take for granted.
Planned activities include a group hike on Mount Katahdin, a “Cancer Stinks Happy Hour,” a regular poker night, bowling, movie nights, Casco Bay cruises and surfing.
Villandry said surfing this summer was a major milestone in her journey. While she doesn’t yet have enough stamina for some activities, she is hooked on yoga and takes walks with her dogs.
“You operate under this notion once chemo is done, you’re going to bounce right back,” she said. “Cancer survivorship is living with a chronic disease. Remission is not a cure.”
Villandry said she hopes Live2Thrive will bring more awareness to the men and women in society’s middle generation. She cited a 2006 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) report encompassing nearly 30 years and said the mortality rate for cancers in young adults has remained steady at 50 percent, while cancers affecting others such as pediatric leukemia are now essentially curable.
“That offends me,” she said.
Highlights from a National Cancer Institute cancer epidemiology report for young adults between the ages of 15 and 29, spanning 1975 to 2000 show, “survival improvement trends portend a worse prognosis for young adults diagnosed with cancer today than 25 years ago, and the deficit is increasing with longer follow up.”
According to the report, “lack of awareness, inadequate health insurance coverage, lack of clinical trial participation, and a deficit in translational research” are all contributing factors to a higher mortality rate than those found with pediatric or geriatric cancers.
While there are social support programs available for patients with other illnesses, Villandry is an advocate of a “cancer rehab program” to provide patients with sustained support after treatment.
In terms of advice for people who aren’t sure how to offer support to a friend with cancer, Villandry said, “Be the same friend you were before.”
“Some people for their own reasons, can’t do it,” she said, adding her own friendships were not immune from change.
While she lost some friends, she had others who gathered around her hospital bed with “rag mags” and talk of boys, dating and parenthood.
Since her treatment ended, Villandry has stepped back into the dating scene, but said at the time she was still figuring out her own sense of normal and wasn’t ready to emotionally invest in a relationship.
“I actually went on a few dates when I was still bald,” she said. She has become even more selective about men and jokes, “Cancer is a great screening question.”
For more information about Live2Thrive and the Cancer Community Center, call 774-2200 or visit www.cancercommunitycenter.com. To make a donation, visit www.firstgiving.com/bethv.
Anyone interested in attending the Live2Thrive brunch, must call the Cancer Community Center to register by noon this Saturday. Anyone who has not previously registered for Hit the Trails may make a donation on the day of the event.
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